The Alchemyst: The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel

    This book was a book about kids dicovering their potential in the magic world. Much like the Harry Potter series, someone tells a few unruly teenagers that they have the ability to produce and use magic. Ultimately, the two teens, Sophie and Josh, have to get their parents back from the bad-guy wizard with their new-found and not-yet-fully-harnessed powers.

    On a scale of five stars, I'd give it a 3. I'm not really into the whole "magic" thing, so this was kind of a stretch from my normal reading style. If I had to read any novel featuring the same amount of discussing about magic, it wouldn't be this one. Only read this book if you like to read about the "magic side of the world." Almost anybody else who doesn't usually read these types of books will just not appreciate it fully.

The Lexicon of Stupidity: Ross & Kathryn Petras

    This is exactly what it sounds like- that is, a book stuffed to the breaking point of its spine with the stupidest things you've never heard, but would kick yourself for missing. It sports quotes from Dan Quayle, Donald Rumsfeld, the guitarist from Metallica- Kirk Hammett, and, of course they would never leave this man out, George W. Bush. No overstuffed compedium of stupidity is complete without making a mockery out of our nation's over-confident leader.

    On a scale of 1 to 5, I would plant this novel atop the throne. Giving it, of course, a 6! Some people might find it an opportunity to disagree with me and give it a number that is actually on the scale, BUT THEY WOULD BE WRONG! To each his own, and to everyone my opinion hath been offered forth like a grouping of golden coins torn out of my last safe nook of my basement. Anyway... just read the book. Everyone likes to laugh, and this book will make you lose control over the volume of your voice, or anything else you so recently thought you had control of.

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring: J.R.R. Tolkien

    This is ultimately one of the greatest books of all time. Lots of big words, so you have to be over-articulate when sounding the longer words out in your head. Anyone that has had experience with J.R.R. Tolien's work will know that he is an acquired taste. A taste that much pleases me to be present in my head... or mouth, but I've never eaten the book. Hmmmm...

     Anyway, there are a few parts that may seem like it could never be worth reading your way through all the descriptions that are written before you. Those are the parts that you just have to erase from your mind when remembering the book and push on towards "The Two Towers."

    Note: This book was written around the mid-1900s. There are some words that you may never have known existed, but they're real. Just look them up and keep reading.

    Note-Note: When Tom Bombadil enters the story, you are somewhat permitted to skip over his part.

    Note-Note-Note: If you're this wussy of a reader, go read "The Little Engine That Could."